Feeling physically blehhh today. My left shoulder is really hurting me. I’ve been having pain in the joint for the last six or eight weeks, but now it’s spread to the muscles in my shoulder, upper arm, and the side of my neck. Moving my arm from the shoulder at all hurts.
I should probably go to the doctor, but I probably won’t. I’m always afraid my PCP will think I’m just a hypochondriac because I’m crazy and already have so many things wrong with me. Hell, a lot of the time I feel like I’m a hypochondriac.
Even if I did go see him, I doubt he’d do anything but refer me for PT, which I have no way of getting to. Honestly, I also just don’t have great faith in physical therapist. I went through five of them for my lower back with zero improvement. I guess I could go back to the physiatrist I saw for my back, but he’d probably just want to do cortisone shots, which I’m not thrilled about in general.
And honestly I just don’t want another doctor to tell me something else is wrong with me. PCP’s already concerned about my pulse–I have a high resting heart rate (upper 80’s) that gets even higher when I stand up–and thinks I may have heart issues. I basically just blew him off about that because NOPE NOTHING ELSE WRONG WITH ME.
I did manage to sit out on the porch swing and work on a shawl I’m knitting for myself. The hazards of outdoor knitting: when your ball of brown yarn rolls off the porch and into the bushes, it’s very hard to find because camouflage. I also blocked my sister’s shawl.
My sister’s shawl (Portico by Kirsten Kapur) blocking on a towel on the couch.
My shawl, WIP. (Rockefeller by Stephen West)